So my son has some anxiety issues we think. He worries about almost everything from throwing up to crying. He cries because he can't stop worrying about crying. It breaks our hearts to think he might be suffering inside. This week has been a great week for him. He has been trying so hard and doing so well. If you ask him though, he will proudly attribute it all to God, which I find to be extraordinary. He has asked me to pray with him every morning before school, and he reminds me every morning. We pray together and he comes home happy. Prayer for him is that simple. Ask God and receive. Here is his average nightly prayer.
Jesus, help me go to sleep really fast and to sleep all through the night like I did on the first day (Not real sure when the first day was). I love you even better than the whole world. (Then he repeats the whole thing) (then) amen.
The prayer works for him. For him, if He needs something he asks. I wish we could all be like that. God says we have not because we ask not. Too often we try to attain what we need by ourselves and fail by getting a cheap rip off version of what God wants to give us freely. I struggle honestly with faith in prayer. Too often, I have lost people I genuinely thought God would heal. I have prayed hours and hours of prayer for things that have never happened. This means they were not what God wanted which is Ok with me. I pray for God to help me overcome my unbelief that He WANTS these great things for me and my family. I have always believed without trouble God's ability, my doubt is with His desire. I think though that God does not always do what He desires because He knows that what He desires isn't what we need. Like when Jesus asked for a different way to pay for our sin. I do not think for one moment that God desired to see His Son treated the way He was. But it was necessary. Maybe that's still what God does.
Sing.
Migrate.
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Friday, January 30, 2009
The First Day
I'm a simple person to figure out. I usually write it all down here. I try not to pretend to be anything. I am what I am and that's good enough until it's not anymore. I want my kids to remember me smiling when I'm gone. Integrity is the very basis of a good life. I love my God, my wife, my kids, my friends, and I try to love all of the rest of you.
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The big C is awesome!
ReplyDeleteHow precious is that.
ReplyDeleteYes, we all need to be more like your little boy.
When we found out we were pregnant with our 4th, I have to say it was much more than a surprise. Not only were we not trying, but we were actively trying not to get pregnant.
ReplyDeleteWhen we told the kids, Ava who was 5 chirped in and said..."Cool, I have been asking Jesus for a brother"! We laughed and as the months went by she kept insisting that this was her baby that she had asked for and that it was a boy. In our adult unbelief, we kept telling her that it was likely a girl, and that she should not get her hopes too high. (I mean we were 3 and 0 in the girl dept)..
so the day came and we had our ultrasound, and it was a boy. Ava just looked at us and said..."I told you...I asked Jesus for a brother".
She will tell anyone to this day that Vaughn was the answer to her prayers. She prays with such faith..I am in awe.